I'm baaack...

Well, some may have noticed (or not) that it's been a while since I've posted to the ole' Burpo Banter. In fact, so long that we had another child and she's already turned one! Elena is her name, in case you're wondering - and you may hear something else about her from time to time.

Believe it or not, I've thought a lot about "relaunching" the blog over the past three to 12 months but thinking is clearly about as far as it got. So why now? Why on December 17, 2010? Well, I read another family blog this week that greatly inspired me. You see, a college friend of Jeff's met and married the love of his life while they were at Rice University. They had two beautiful boys and generally, life was good until she was diagnosed with breast cancer in 2006. That's when, together, they embarked on a long journey of hope. Hope for a cure. Hope that the cancer wouldn't spread. (It did.) Hope that some treatment would work. (It didn't.) After many hours of chemo and many days spent in and out of the hospital over the past several years while they maintained as much courage and positive attitude as they could, this week they learned that they have run out of options and as Jeff's friend puts it, they are now focused on hope of a different kind: hope that he can keep his soul mate as comfortable as possible until the end and that their family can cherish their remaining days together.

Jeff - and I through him - have been following this painful story through the magic of Facebook, but also through a beautiful blog that they have chosen to share with loved ones...and the world, really. It so eloquently chronicles their path through this difficult time, yet also shows the amazing courage of all four of them as in between updates on chemo and other treatments, you see pictures of smiling boys with their parents on holidays, birthdays, their first day of school, at a basketball game, on a camping trip...as if they were living the life of any "normal" family. And somehow, part of what was amazing about the blog was that they started it before she was ever sick - so in the beginning it's just like this one, a report on their day-to-day life until one day they had the rug pulled out from under them and life has never been the same. Over the past week, if you put aside the sheer heartache Jeff and I both feel over the situation they are facing, I have so appreciated being able to read their stories because it has been like a gift - in what has frankly not been the best of years for Jeff and I - of greater appreciation for all that we do have.

So, in the end that is what made me finally decide to stop thinking about it and start writing about it...again. I have told myself that to really keep this up, I need to focus on keeping things short and sweet. Ha - we'll see! But for now, I thought I'd leave you with a quote from a post the day Jeff's friend realized that things really weren't looking good for his wife and said this to his older 10-year-old son, because I think that it's really applicable to all of us:

"...time may be short and very precious. What's important is that we stay connected to the present - today we have each other, today we can give hugs and share smiles and love."

Until I write again.

I-A-N. Ian!

There are some milestones in your child's life that you just know will be exciting. Like, the first time they smile or crawl or walk or talk. But last week we had one that I didn't expect (perhaps because I never thought about it): Ian wrote his name for the first time! And, it was actually legible! Okay, well, it was mostly legible.

It happened while we were out to dinner one night. He was drawing "pictures" with crayons. Jeff and I were talking and he said something like, "Look, I wrote my name!" Of course, my first thought was, "Right, of course you did..." Then, I looked over and he really did! We asked him to show us, and with full concentration, he did it again. The I and A were quite decent, while it was clear the N was a little more difficult. More like a sideways S, really. And, it was backwards. But hey, it's a start!

The ironic thing about this was that a couple of weeks earlier I was reading online that it's not uncommon for kids around his age to start writing their names. I was quite taken back to see this because I didn't sense he was close to being able to form letters on his own. I even went as far as asking his teacher about it a few days later and her response was that he was not old enough yet to be concerned about whether or not he could write his name. Her suggestion was to continue doing a lot of reading and to encourage him to draw, and that the letters would come eventually. Okie dokie.

And then not long after that, we had our little milestone! I don't know what it is, but there seems to be something particularly neat about seeing him learning to actually write and form words on his own. He's also generally starting to show a lot of curiosity with words - saying the letters and asking what word it spells. For example, he did this with the Jif peanut butter jar this morning - pointed out the J-I-F and asked what it spelled, and then, what that meant. Oh, and on a somewhat related note, we are also suddenly being asked what the name of every song is on the radio. Yesterday, I had to say, "Well, this song is called Bad Girls by Donna Summer," which seemed potentially inappropriate. It didn't seem to phase him, though. He just said, "Oh," and kept right on playing his air drums (another new trend) in the back seat.

Anyway, back to that whole name writing thing...we were quite the proud parents that evening, I must say. Here's some evidence:

Until I write again.

Going to new Depths

Our shopping trips to our local New Seasons are always somewhat dangerous for me because in addition to their great selection of edible products, they happen to have a pretty great department of all natural, organic bath and beauty products. Undoubtedly, I often find myself venturing over to these aisles for a quick scan of the latest and greatest products available for purchase.

A couple of weeks ago we were in the store hightailing it to the produce department (after all, you know how committed I am to my fruits and veggies), walking right past the beauty products when a new product caught my eye. It was prominently displayed at the end of one of the

aisles. (Those product placement people are soooo smart!) It was in pretty blue packaging - and let's face it, I'm a sucker for pretty packaging - and the name was Depth. There was a lotion, a body wash, hand soap, shave cream, shampoo and conditioner. The lotion had a tester so, among the four they had available, I selected a scent called "Ocean Blossom." Suffice it to say that it was love at first smell. I spent the rest of the time in the store sniffing my hands to take it all in. Hopefully that didn't look too strange.

That night I did some quick research online on this new Depth product and liked what I saw. It's a fairly young company that was started by a husband and wife who are/were marine biologists. As stated on their Web site, one of the reasons they started the company was to bring the "beauty, abundance and therapeutic benefits of marine botanicals to consumers..." I like that. The product line is organic and natural. And did I mention it smells heavenly and has lovely environmentally friendly packaging? Of course, the neatest part is that a percentage of the sale of every product goes toward a nonprofit camp in Monterey Bay that provides marine experiences to underprivileged children and instills in them a love and respect for the sea and marine life. Oh, and it also smells great. And, the packaging is lovely. (Did I already say that?)

While Ian and I were at New Seasons on Monday, I decided it was time to stop draining their lotion testers and took the plunge (pun intended) with my first Depth purchase - the daily shampoo. I've only used it a couple of times but so far, it's great. So, I guess it's safe to say they've got a new fan. And they aren't even paying me to write this! (Hey, isn't that how this blogging thing is really supposed to work??)

Until I write again.

Didn't I say I wasn't going to do that?

Right from the beginning of this second pregnancy I knew that one of the things I wouldn't have spend any time worrying about this time around was room preparation. Well, okay, let me back up and say that I did know we would need to decide which room this little one would occupy but once that decision was made - it would be smooth sailing. I mean, I already had all the stuff. The bedding, the furniture, the wall hangings, etc. What a relief, right? Yeah, right.

Of course, first let's not underestimate the magnitude of the actual room decision. And honestly, we've known this might become a bit of an issue at some point from oh, say, the day we put an offer in on this house. Sadly, what was not at issue was the fact that Jeff would be kicked out of his office. Yeah sure, he happens to use that room to help generate our family income when he's not on client site - but still - something needed to give and his office was it. (Unfortunately, while it seems that the most obvious solution would be for him to take over the downstairs den/office area, the design of the built-in work space in that room does not work well for people taller than about five feet. It actually would have worked better for us if they had left that room as an empty space.) So, we knew from the start that his office would likely be relocating to the basement area, making it a dual purpose second living/office area.

But the next question was whether that office would become the new baby's room or the new guest room (obviously making the current guest room the new baby's room). This is where our opinions differed. My husband, Mr. I-look-at-everything-from-a-very-logical-point-of-view, was strongly in favor of using the small room as the baby's room. His argument being: A) How much space does one little tiny baby need? (um, did he notice the size of our last one?); B) It would be all the more convenient to have the kid right next door as Ian was when he was a little tike; and C) While we do love every one of our guests dearly, the current guest bedroom location just seems a little more natural than the smaller room right next door to ours. Meanwhile, my argument was that while I totally got all of his arguments, I just happen to like the other bedroom more. It's larger, it's brighter, it has a better view out the windows and well, it just makes me happier when I'm in there. So, we'd broach the subject every now and then. He'd voice his opinion. I'd do the whole, "I hear you" thing and then make my perhaps more subjective but I felt, equally compelling, arguments and then we'd drop it for a while.

Until one day not all that long ago, I was on Facebook and saw a post from Sharon, who (along with her husband) bought our old house in Arlington and also happens to be pregnant with their second child. She had a status update about being so pleased that Restoration Hardware Baby & Child had so much great gender-neutral stuff for decorating their new baby's room. This immediately spelled trouble. Restoration Hardware? Baby & Child? Hmmm...I knew they had dipped their toes into the baby market but how far? I figured I'd go check out the site. You know, just for fun. And off I went. Within a few clicks I was perusing multiple pages of what had clearly become an entirely new business line for RH. And first of all, let me ask, how did I miss this when I was going through all these decor issues with Ian's room? Annoying. And second of all, it was like one-stop baby room shopping! Great colors that weren't too cutesy (and Sharon was right - some very nice gender-neutral selections) with coordinating bedding, lighting, wall colors (all their stuff matches their paint colors perfectly - imagine that!) and let's not forget a plethora of coordinating overpriced accessories that include wall hangings, storage baskets, blankets, stuffed animals, etc.

By my fifth or so visit to the site, there was a plan forming in that planner head of mine. It went something like this: "Well, you know, maybe - just maybe - I wouldn't feel as bad about that little room if we spruce it up a bit. You know, paint the walls a lighter color to brighten it up and make it seem larger, change out the bedding..." And before I knew it, the UPS man was dropping this off at our door:

For anyone wondering what the heck it is - it's a crib bumper. A cuddle plush crib bumper in chocolate with silver sage piping, to be specific. Which, I know are somewhat controversial these days, but we did use one with Ian until he was five(ish) months - which is probably how this one will go as well and why I purchased it for 50% off. So, suffice it to say that we have a plan now, which is that our new bundle of joy will be occupying Jeff's former office next to our room for at least the first year or two. The guest room will remain as-is for now (minus some closet reorg). We'll be using all of Ian's old baby furniture (I didn't go that out of my mind!) with the new bumper, a new sheet and crib skirt (both identified but I'm waiting to see if they also go on sale at some point since we have time) - along with likely a new table lamp and shade, and perhaps some new storage baskets that match the new colors. The wall color will be RH's Silver Sage - though there's a decent chance we'll use the Benjamin Moore match called Gray Wisp simply because we like BM paints and know we can get a good quality low VOC option there.

And last, but not least, the one remaining issue with the smaller room was/is the closet. It's a fairly small closet that has one hanging bar that is up way too high for it to be functional for me on a daily basis. So, the solution there is that we'll be taking out the existing bar and shelf, patching/prepping the closet and installing a new Elfa closet system from the Container Store that will have a combination of hanging space, drawers and shelving. And with that, I can now report that our next child will not be homeless. Item one checked off the list, only about fifty three more to go and we'll be ready. Oh, and if anyone needs a like-new cute lamb baby bedding set from Pottery Barn Kids - complete with matching rug - it'll be on Portland's Craigslist soon.

Until I write again.

Take me out to the ball game

This afternoon we took Ian to his first ever live sporting event: A Portland Beavers baseball game. The Beavers are a Minor League farm team for the San Diego Padres. Unfortunately, they may not be in Portland much longer because their home field - PGE Park - is in jeopardy to due the arrival of a Major League Soccer team in Portland soon. (Apparently Portland is more of a soccer town than baseball town, so the Beavers may be gone by 2011.) Which made it even more imperative that we make it to one of their games! Plus, Sundays are kids' day at the park where kids eat free before the game and they have a game area set up for them, in addition to other activities.

PGE Park is on the edge of downtown so rather spend a couple of hours in search of street parking, we opted to take the "electric train," as Ian calls it. Of course this mode of transportation also earned us triple bonus points for the day given that the ride there and back was half the fun. A mere $15 got us all in the gate for general admission seating which allowed us to pick any seat we wanted in the upper half of the stadium. Sadly, the crowds were not huge (perhaps more evidence why the Beavers may not be around much longer) but it still had all the makings of a good day at the ballpark: a warm day, overpriced food, (relatively) good music and vendors circling with every type of junk food you can imagine.

The actual game portion of the outing kept Ian's attention for approximately three innings before he became more interested in walking around, climbing the stairs and generally not sitting still for more than two seconds. That said, he is a very loyal and enthusiastic clapper and always took a moment out from other activities to participate in cheering on the home team. By the fourth inning we headed over the kids' area where Ian participated in a little batting practice himself before he announced that he was ready to hop the train back home. We were really hoping he'd make it to the seventh inning so he could hear Take Me Out to the Ball Game given he recently learned that song at school and has been quick to add it to his concert repertoire at home. However, it clearly wasn't meant to be for today, so off we went to catch the

train for the few stops to our home station.

As for me, that was my first Minor League game ever, I believe. I did have a moment where I wished that we had the opportunity to take him to a Washington Nationals game in their new stadium (the stadium was still being built when we moved) and of course taken the Metro to get there. Boy, he would have just been beside himself with the whole Metro system! But, as Jeff rightly pointed out, he could care less about the difference between the minors and majors or what stadium he's in....he was just happy to be part of a real sporting event. (Though, we do have hopes of taking him up for Seattle for a Mariners' game at some point.) Maybe next time we'll even make it to the seventh inning stretch.

Until I write again.

How our son spent his "rest time" yesterday

Ian was never the type of baby who was "into everything," as they say. Once he became mobile, I must say that we got by with minimal baby proofing because he was just the type of kid who, as soon as we said "No!" would turn and go the other direction. No issues. No questions asked. (Maybe because he couldn't talk at the time?) Plus, we also just made it policy to not divert our eyes from him for too long. So, suffice it to say that aside from some sensible safety basics, that hiding everything, putting locks on cabinets, toilet seats, etc. was not as much of a concern for us as it might be for some others who have little ones of a more exploratory nature, shall we say. Bottom line: It was just never a problem with him. Until yesterday.

After a somewhat crazy, but enjoyable morning at OMSI - we came home and did the usual routine of lunch, clean up and a little Sesame Street before it was time to head upstairs for "rest time." As I've mentioned several times before here, rest time rarely involves actual sleeping these days. But still, the idea is to spend some quiet time "resting" in his room. The reality is that since moving into a bed and becoming potty trained, rest time for Ian is more about seeing how many times one can go to the bathroom in an hour. And believe me, if there was a category for this in the Guinness Book of World Records, he would hold the record for sure.

However, yesterday started out a little different. Things were quiet. Very quiet, actually. So much so that for a good while I was almost convinced that maybe this was one of those rare days where he actually fell asleep. So, I went about my business downstairs and after an hour and a half, went up to retrieve him for a snack and some play time before we headed out to his last swim lesson of the season. When I reached the top of the stairs I noticed that the bathroom door was closed and the light was on. Okay, so this was probably trip #50 to the bathroom today and he had just managed to be extra quiet. As I try to do before entering, I quickly knocked and opened the door. What I found was not a pretty scene.

Ian, who was standing on his step stool at the sink with sunscreen tube in hand, turned to see me with a look of surprise and horror on his face at clearly being caught mid-act. And speaking of his face, it just so happened to be covered in pure white - along with part of his hair, shirt, the counter and the wall behind him. The top drawer was wide open and sprawled out on the counter was a cocktail, really, of open toothpaste tubes, lotions, sunscreens, Neosporin, Aquaphor, you name it. Quite shocked I said, "Ian! What are you doing??!," for which his response was to immediately scrunch up his white face and eyes and start bawling, accompanied by the now typical chant of, "I want my daddy! I want my daddy!" The sight was more than I could take. Not quite sure how to handle this appropriately, I immediately did what any parent would do when they've just found their preschooler covered head to toe in white lotions: I left the room and went into our bedroom and laughed. Quietly, of course. More than anything, I really wanted to go downstairs and get my camera to capture this moment and then of course post it to Facebook, Twitter, this blog and any other online forum I could think of - but my logical parent brain kicked into gear and I decided that pulling out the camera might not be the best way to discourage this type of activity in the future. So sadly, no photos.

Once I regrouped, I returned to the scene of the crime where Ian was still standing there just as I had left him crying for his daddy. Still somewhat shocked at what he had done and buying time for what my next move should be, I asked him, "Why do you want daddy?" "Because I don't like you!," he said. Geez, and I hadn't even done anything yet, but thanks, I'll tuck that one in my back pocket for later. Maybe it was a combination of those words, the mess that was on the counter, the wasted sunscreen (which isn't cheap, by the way) and the fact that it was clear that he now needed a bath - that finally kicked me into the "okay, now I'm upset" mode. Luckily I had recently reread our Love and Logic book so my brain did a quick scan to recall what would the authors would say to do in this particular situation. Answer (I think): We had a problem and he needed to be a participant in helping me solve it.

Me: So, it looks like you've decided to make a big mess here. How do you think we're going to get this cleaned up?

Ian: I don't know! (Followed by more "Wahhh!! I want my daddy!" Puhleease, enough already.)

Me: Well, daddy isn't here and he's not going to help you clean this up. Do you have any other ideas?

Ian: No.

Me: Well, let me give you some ideas...

I was winging it, really. (After all, isn't that what first time parenting is all about?) But the bottom line is that we agreed that he'd help me clean up what he could and then he had to choose a toy that he couldn't play with through the weekend. In addition, he would not be having his current favorite snack (graham crackers and peanut butter) that afternoon and through the weekend, as well as any tostadas (aka, cheese quesadillas, which continue to be his favorite food and I'm positive he'd eat them for every single meal if we let him). "Okay," he said. (Sniff, sniff.)

And that is how our son spent his "rest time" yesterday.

Until I write again.

The Somewhat (infrequent) Daily Quote

Mommy, I'm done talking now about the days of the week. You can focus on your driving and I'll just sit here, okay?

Followed a minute later by...

Mommy, how is your new hair color?

-Ian Burpo, Age 3, heard while driving to school this morning after I had been quizzing him for a few minutes on the days of the week. I guess he got tired of playing along. So thoughtful of him to ask about my hair though! (It was a big day yesterday on the hair front - I finally took the plunge and got it highlighted to help hide the gray that was overtaking my head at light speed.) So the answer was, "I'm quite pleased with it, thank you very much for asking."

Until I write again.